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The Good: Today is your birthday.

7. The bad: Everyone forgot about it.
The worse: Even your mom. (Spyder)

6. The bad: On your way to the party, you got hit by a truck full of manure.
The worse: You were on a deserted road with hardly a drop of water within 100 miles. (Mr. Roboto)

5. The bad: It's also your dog's, and unlike you, he gets a party.
The worse: Your dog's dead. (alfonso)

4. The bad: Your girlfriend announces she is having your baby.
The worse: Your wife said the same thing this morning. (pops)

3. The bad: Everyone's least favorite coworker invited himself along to your birthday lunch.
The worse: It's your boss. (Jennie)

2. The bad: Only one person remembered.
The worse: It's your overly affectionate large cellmate. (MartinFisher)

carliem's day was looking up too, what a shame...

1. The bad: It's also your long lost Aunt Beatrice's birthday.
The worse: You get matching sweaters.

Originally published: 08/05/1999

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