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The Good: You won a bet.

7. The bad: Against a loan shark.
The worse: Now you can keep your leg. /Vinny

6. The bad: You bet that George W. Bush would be elected president.
The worse: The $5,000 you won is little consolation since now you've got to look at another President Bush for the next four years. /Gerry

5. The bad: You couldn't stay in gamblers anonymous for one month.
The worse: They found out about the bet and kicked you out. /muddlo

4. The bad: Now the Mafia's really mad at you.
The worse: They know where you live. /Smokey the Bear

3. The bad: You were betting on a woman's breast, and had to ask her.
The worse: You bet on 'fake.' /Emperor

2. The bad: It's with your mom over who your sisters real father is.
The worse: You bet that it was you. /Playboy

Homer Time knows that winning isn't everything...

1. The bad: You bet against yourself.
The worse: In a fight-to-the-death match.

Originally published: 08/24/2000

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