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Hint: Duh

Candidate for understatement of the year:

AP Headline: FBI Says Clues May Have Been Missed

Shoot! Wait, don't!

Reuters Headline: Judges Want to Keep Guns Out of Courthouse in Utah

AP Headline: Verdict Triggers Shootout in Milwaukee Courtroom

Oh well. Can't win them all.

Crispy $10 bills

A New York man hid $20,000 in his girlfriend's oven only to have it catch fire, for those of you who want to know if people actually have money to burn.

Uh, welcome, uh, to the news

Brian Williams, heir to the NBC Nightly Newsdesk, on the Columbine massacre:

"The pictures you're seeing tell just a small part of a story which was, uh, wrenching, uh, to watch, uh, horrific for the millions of Americans, uh, television viewers who watched it play out, horrific, uh, to watch and, uh, imagine, tonight, uh, the horrible, uh, weight among the parents of [the dead] students."

Uh, been hanging around Bush?

You thought Survivor was bad

RT Early Warning System:

- Model Anna Nicole Smith has her own reality TV show.

- James Woods will play Rudolph Giuliani in a movie about his life.

Smile, you're under arrest

Researchers in London have learned that smiling faces are easier for facial recognition technology to match, for those of you that smile at the camera as you shoplift.

The terrorists are winning

The Wall Street Journal reports that United States Postal Service's Priority Mail actually takes longer than first class mail, even though Priority Mail costs more.

They blame new security measures, but doesn't that mean that the first class mail doesn't have any?

How much will it cost you for the page to load?

The website http://www.barclaycard.co.uk/timeismoney/ let's you calculate how much a minute of your time costs based on your income and job, for those of you who thought there wasn't a website for everything.

Funny when you exercise

According to a new survey, people who wear funny aprons are three times as likely to exercise than those who don't.

Wonder how much money reading that cost you.

We mean it

ripcurlgirl** writes in:

"Why does it say on packages which are giving away free prizes that no purchase is necessary? Is it the shoplifter special?"

Just don't smile into the camera.

Sources: AP, Chicago Sun-Times, Reuters

Originally published: 05/30/2002

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