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Top Ten Things to Do on a Test When You Know You Are Going to Fail

There's so many great things to do on a test, here's some honorable mentions...

Add that you love the teacher, in the top corner. (StaceMystr)

Practice writing on it with your left while eyes are closed. (jonny)

Claim your undying love for the teacher, even if your teacher is the same sex as you. (Joenifty1@aol.com)

Eat your test. (dogleg)

Put "so what?" for all the answers. (awalker1@olivet.edu)

Hum the Jeopardy theme song. (Paul)

End every answer with "...and if I get this wrong you're a dead man!" (Praxite)

10. A,B,B,D,C,A,D,A,B,A,C,C,A,D,A,B,A. (EMMIE BABY)

9. For really wacky fun, answer every question with the name of various canadian prime ministers. (Chris W)

8. Put bite marks everywhere and it big letters write "I'm a hungry" (Chris W)

7. After every question write "Well you should know you're the teacher, why the hell are you asking me anyway?" (Emperor Freaky)

6. Write all of your answers in blood. (amishboy)

5. Fill in all of the bubbles, confusing the scantron machine. (Leash)

4. Three words: No. 3 Pencil (MsMouse)

3. In the space provided, instead of answering the question, provide a lengthy and highly technical diagram documenting the ease with which a pipe bomb can be assembled and placed in a certain vehicle that currently resides in the school's parking lot. (turtle88)

2. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice. (Paul)

Here's the #1 thing to do on a test submitted by GPB, I don't recommend this, though....

1. Every 15 minutes, rip up the test and yell "Merry Christmas". Ask for another copy of the test. Say you lost the first one. Repeat every 15 minutes.

Originally published: 11/01/1997

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